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  Ndoreketa

Ra's friday story

Of known facts, past experiences and presented evidence

8/7/2015

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I have a very deep fear of dogs that  I cannot for the life of me understand or figure out. I just lose all sense of security whenever I see a dog and as if on cue most dogs respond to me in a hostile way which just cements my fears and anxiety. As such I avoid houses or neighbourhoods that have dogs - even little puppies - they are small but they are dogs right? So that is how I had gone two years without visiting a particular aunt of mine and after one too many awkward moments at family events about my not visiting, I gathered the nerves to visit her 'dog hounded neighbourhood one afternoon.

I know I am a bit biased but on a real note her neighbourhood has a reputation for dogs. As in the very vicious hounds of stray dogs that terrorise people any day. I have been made to believe these dogs attack vehicles - yes cars. These dogs are just on another level. If a resident fails to lock their gates, these dogs are known to enter into the compound in search of food in the bin and if the owner dares to come out to find out what's going on, the dogs can even attack the owner!! These dogs are so vicious  residents are warned not to move around late at night alone or in a number that may not fight off these packs - even when in groups should they encounter these wild stray dogs, residents should avoid everything possible in startling them.

So on the day I visited my aunt I arrived in broad daylight with a lot of people moving around so I was safe. Spent the afternoon chatting and catching up and of course being African waiting for the food that was being prepared and indulging. You can't afford to have people think you hold something against them or do not approve their standard of cooking or meals by refusing food. So we sat, talked and ate and by the time it was appropriate to leave it was now dark. My aunt tried to make me spend the night, but I pleaded early morning meetings and no change of clothes. Knowing me,  she brought up stray dogs and had my cousin show me his own scars from a recent encounter with some dogs and I was really torn now. Dogs were after all dangerous, i had heard of their reputation, had a fair share of snarls and barks and here was evidence but I had to go. My rational mind came up with the idea that she was making up the story and I should pay her no heed, and I boldly agreed with that part of my mind and told her that I'll be fine.

Ignoring my deeply imbedded knowledge of the stray vicious hounds, my aunt's reminder and my cousins evidence, I bade them farewell and started walking towards the bus stop. It was dark and windy and all I could imagine was dogs following me behind. I could almost hear them but every time I turned back, there was just nothing. Two houses away from the bus stop, just as I was to let the voice in my head do the victory dance for coming this far, I heard a dog bark from one of the houses in front of me. And just at the same time a bus pulled up at the bus stop. Now there was that barking dog between where I was and the bus.I froze, I didn't know what to do. Do I run like a mad man to the bus or stand there and hope the people coming out from the bus will come to my rescue. I slowly crept towards the bus stop and as I drew close to that house I realised the dog was safely locked behind the gates. I sighed in relief and pride then walked the rest of the way to and the bus. I was so happy and proud of myself for braving that walk even with all the knowledge, evidence and reminders of possible danger I had been given.

We all have irrational and unfounded fears. Fear of failure, fear that people will laugh at us when we fail, fear that things will go wrong, fear the we are not good enough so much fears and uncertainty. Some of these fears have no bases, we're not even sure of whether they're real or not, but in the end, we still allow these fears to stop us from making decisions, we allow these fears to stop us from doing what we want to do, to achieve our goals, to finish that course, to start that business.

Like my irrational fear for dogs, many of us fail to take the bold step towards our goals for all the best rest reasons why we can't that's only real and exists in our heads. But until we try, until we attempt to do that which we fear, we would never know what lies on the other

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    Every Friday Ra reflects on everyday incidents to share some extra ordinary reflections and learnings

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